“I want your most honest answer.”
“Why are you pausing? You are not real if you need to think.”
“You must be thinking a lie as you pause.”
It comes natural to us that our realness of self mostly comes from our first instinctive thought and feeling.
If we are real, we do not have to think twice about our acts and thinking, or take time to hide our emotions.
It is indeed true that we want to be real, and our realness of self never changes no matter how much the outer world has restrained us – we are who we are (see my previous sharing on realness of self: ). And upon our moment of staying true to ourselves, the amount of pressure and temptations from the outer world is no any lessened nor lightened. We are still continually challenged or misled in any possible way.
That is perhaps how we lose trust in ours and others’ realness, and arrive at the presumptuous belief that the realest moments of our thinking and emotions, would be the slip of tongues or our unconscious acts.
Our impulsions, irrationality and lost of control under the heated conflicts, emergencies or loss of security.
Only upon that moment we all believe the other person, “you finally show your true side”.
Yet I believe that for those “off guarded” moments yet do not reflect our realness.
Our disguise and alter “sides” stay too long within us so long that we may even gradually lose the ability to take the outer layers off.
How can the blissful moment of strike completely remove our deep mask?
At the moments of impulses and abruptness, what I feel from the other individual is indeed one covered with defense, distrust, fear and insecurity.
There is hardly any time for him/her to cool off and grasp the feeling of safeness/security.
No serenity, no tranquility, no peace.
How can a person be real when being so vulnerable and unprotected?
In our daily immediate and rather automatic responses to the others, we take time looking into them and reflect on its relation to our actual innerness.
Open ourselves to the patience of seeking the true voice.
Perhaps we keep exploring on our layers of protective coverage.
And Deeper, and deeper, we find our true selves.
And all is under the importance of us having time to bring “the Us” out.